


Yearning

by Mat_Neptune



Category: Red Dead Redemption (Video Games)
Genre: Angst, Fluff, Loneliness, M/M, Non-Canonical Character Death, Shady Belle chapter, also Cain died, mild spoilers but if you love kieran than MAJOR SPOILERS, this is self indulgent.... I was feeling REALLY sad when I started this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-17
Updated: 2019-11-17
Packaged: 2021-02-07 14:10:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 861
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21459331
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mat_Neptune/pseuds/Mat_Neptune
Summary: He longed for Arthur to come back, to tell him everything’s alright, to reassure him that Kieran’s not dying anytime soon.
Relationships: Kieran Duffy & Mary-Beth Gaskill, Kieran Duffy/Arthur Morgan
Comments: 1
Kudos: 53





	Yearning

He hid in his room. He hid and cried, and sobbed, and panicked and stopped, and cried again. Kieran’s breakdowns and panic attacks were getting worse. He was terrified of Colm O’Driscoll. To think, they could’ve gotten him that night, if it weren’t for Cain and Arthur, waking up the entire camp. The things they could’ve done to him, it scares him out of his own skin.

Kieran paced around Arthur’s small room, who was away for a couple of days now. He longed for Arthur to come back, to tell him everything’s alright, to reassure him that Kieran’s not dying anytime soon.

Kieran left the room for the final time that night, finding something at the Chuckwagon to eat alone. He wasn’t touching the stew, he didn’t want to have to deal with people… except…

He tugged on pink cloth, nudging his head to the side when Mary-Beth looked at him. They walked inside Shady Belle, sat at the bottom of the staircase. Kieran leaned onto Mary-Beth, letting her arms wrap around his shoulders. He smelled her lovely perfume, a friendly sent that always calmed him. 

But then his thoughts wandered. He started thinking about Arthur. What if he didn’t come back? What if Colm got to him and killed him instead to send a message to Kieran and the gang? He began crying again, teardrops landing on her chest.

“S-sorry…” He sniffled, pulling his head back to wipe his tears.

Mary-Beth moved Kieran onto her lap, rubbing his back slowly, letting him rest his head on her shoulder more comfortably. “What’s bothering you?”

“S’nothing.”

“It’s not nothing. You pulled me away for a reason…. What is it?”

Kieran stayed silent for a while…. “I’m scared. I’m so, so scared, Mary-Beth.”

She understood immediately. She hums a yes, pulling him closer. “Tell me more, what else are you scared of?”

“I’m… I’m scared of anyone else dying... “ 

“I know… Sean, that poor dog…. But at least you’re here.”

“Mary-Beth…” Kieran looks into her eyes. “What if Arthur is dead?” His crying goes out of control, he clings onto her like an infant, sobbing into her shoulder.

* * *

Kieran forced himself to drink a whole bottle of whiskey, to help him sleep and stop thinking, crying himself to sleep regardless. He slept in Arthur’s room, not even pulling up the blanket that’s tucked under the cot. 

Heavy, exhausted footsteps carried themselves up to the room, stopping just at the bed. “Kieran?” They said softly, tired. A hand gently shook the man awake. “Kieran, move over a bit.” 

“Hm?” 

“Move over a bit, I gotta sit down.” 

Kieran gasps. “ARTHUR!” He leapt to his feet to pull him close. “You’re alive! You’re alive! You came back to me!” 

Arthur rubs his back softly, nuzzling in the crook of Kieran’s neck. “I know I was gone for a while, love. But I’m home…” 

Kieran’s hands moved to Arthur’s cheeks, looking at him in the dim night light. They pressed their lips together, softly, barely breathing. “I love you.” 

“I love you too, Kieran…” Arthur breaths first, kissing Kieran’s lower lip before moving past him to sit on the bed. His boot kicks a bottle, then noticing several on the floor. “What is this?”

“I’ve…. I drank a lot while you were gone… A-at night. To sleep.”

“Clean this up then.” Arthur slowly takes off his boot, groaning at how sore he feels. 

Kieran takes the bottles and goes downstairs to dispose of them, taking a detour to the chuckwagon to pick up some canned strawberries, Arthur’s favorite, and a smaller bottle of whiskey. He comes back, handing the bottle to Arthur first thing. “For you.”

Kieran then opens the can, handing it over and kicks off his boots. 

“Thank you kindly.”

Kieran watches Arthur eat slowly, drinking slowly, and appreciate every part of him. “I do notice…” Kierans fingers trail to Arthur’s lower torso. “You got bigger.”

Arthur’s cheeks turn a bit red. “S’not like I wasn’t eating out there.”

“I know you feed yourself.” Kieran laughs slightly, the cutest laugh ever, even when his voice cracks. “Wish I could get into that habit.”

Arthur stops drinking abruptly. “You  _ do  _ eat, right?” He growls.

“Of course! Just Pearson’s stew  _ but… _ ”

Arthur digs though his satchel to find some salted venison he cooked earlier. “Here, eat this and don’t you dare decline.”

“Thanks.” Kieran smiles, chewing on the meat slowly. He runs his fingers through Arthur’s hair as the older man eats his strawberries and wriggles out of his dirty clothes. 

“Don’t be touching me yet,” Arthur snickers, swatting his hand away. 

Kieran makes up the bed in the dark, suitable for the both of them. Arthur finally lays down, Kieran laying on top of him. He wraps the blanket over him, looking down at Arthur’s pretty face in the dark. “I’m so happy you’re here.” 

“I’m sorry I worried y’all….” Arthur’s large hands rub Kieran’s back softly. “I promise I won’t be gone as late.” He smiles, planting a kiss on Duffy’s lips.

“I was scared Arthur… I thought you died and left me alone.”

“Hey, I promised you…. You’ll never be alone again.”


End file.
